growing up

15 years ago today I sat early in the morning, gazing upon a beautiful sunrise. what did that sunrise represent? My new life? true adulthood? It seemed fitting to sit the day after high school graduation and watch as one life ended and a new began. I've never wanted to grow up. I always felt a kinship to Peter Pan. my self proclaimed personal anthem is Forever Young. I want to be forever young. I tell my kids to stay young forever. I love to be around young people! I thrive off that and each day as the clock ticks and I get older it is quite depressing. I am still 17 in my head. but as my body gets flabby and old I realize I really can't do everything I did way back then. I watch as people make desicions in life and it make me want to cry! Hey! Why are you trying to be so old?!? Why do you want to grow up so fast?!? your teen years are so quickly passed and you can never go back!! Live it! Enjoy it! Go out and have fun! People call me crazy, Hey, I'm not crazy I am just fighting the inevitable, life. I often wonder how I got here. A husband, a house, 4 kids!!! WOW! Aren't I just 17? where did this all come from and how fast!
Today I have shed tears for my youth. Is today the day I realize I have to grow up? I need to stop acting like a child? please tell me it is not true. Please let me be forever young.

(I don't have a grad pic but this is my senior picture)